Friday, 1 March 2013

D is for Dangerous

Everyone is so convinced that Australia is a death trap. You've heard it before, "every living creature there wants to kill you". This is true to an extent. However, I am completely convinced that at least in Australia you can generally avoid such terrifying creatures if you wish.

In Canada near death experiences are at every turn. Whether you're crossing the road, camping, hiking, driving, doing snow sports, or crossing frozen lakes it's a matter of life and death half the time.

Deathly Weather

We've worked out Kamloops has a relatively mild winter, this can't be said for the rest of Canada however. Think you can survive outside for long when it's -30 degC? Unlikely! I hope you like frostbite, frozen lungs and hypothermia because that's what will happen. If the cold isn't enough, feel free to add some freezing rain or fog, wind chill or a blizzard. Check it out all the ways the weather wants to kill you at CBC, love!

Apparently avalanches are a thing here as well. This weekend there is an "Extreme Risk" or something because of the pineapple express (I'm just as confused as you are). The highways have to get closed every so often for avalanche control. Crazy!

Terrifying Creatures

How may you die by an animal in Canada? Let me count the ways.

  • Brown and Grizzly Bears
  • Wolverine
  • Cougars
  • Orca
  • Rattle Snake
  • Elk
  • Polar Bear
  • Moose
  • Recluse Spider
I can't really complain about snakes and spiders in Canada, Australia is obviously worse. However, I maintain I would much rather be bitten by a Brown Snake than a Rattle. I figure while the venom may be much more toxic, the fact that browns are Elapidaes and often do dummy bites totally works in my favour. I can control my lymphatic system much easier than my heart!

Elk are mean and will attack if you're not careful, Moose are generally just dangerous road blocks though I have heard stories of them going after you if you bug them too much.

The amount of camping and hiking stories that have given me chills, is a zillion times higher than the number of people I know who have been involved in a shark attack. This may be due to the fact that you usually don't get a lot of warning with shark attacks, or maybe there are just a lot more carnivores wandering the bush in Canada!

Lethal Driving

Since winter is on the way out, it seems like driving in the snow and ice was just a bad dream. Sadly I know this isn't the case, and really it's the most dangerous part of Canada. The roads and driving conditions are only made worse by the Canadian drivers. This isn't a grumpy expat comment, Canadians have told me on multiple occasions that Canadians suck at driving. I've never corrected them. I mean, would you correct a Victorian when they said people in Victoria couldn't drive?

Living on the edge everyday. It makes Canada such an exciting place to live!


  1. Hahaha! I totally agree, the animals are scary as hell but the driving is far scarier. It really is taking your life in you hands on a daily basis isn't it? Nuts :-D

    1. I can't wait for Spring to come properly and the roads to be clear. I'm sending positive sun thoughts your way!